On countless alters I have laid the world and all concerning me; unnumbered tear stained vows were made, then broken, to my agony! How to resign? Be His at last? Abandon self? I did not know! Twas not the world to help me fast; surrender was my greatest foe.
Was faith to blame? Did I not seek? What evil kept me from my quest?
Some secret sin? Was flesh to week? Was Satan keeping me from rest?
Must I forever rise and fall? Is there no power to break the sway? How often must I give my all and take it back the very day?
I tried in vain to give Him more; the light of hope was growing them; surrender was the barrier that kept my homesick heart from Him.
Is His arm short? Will He not here? Is He reluctant to receive? Is He not ever drawing near to grace the sinner to believe?
I could not yield; I cannot die; my spirit like the moonlight waned; I wearied of the question, “Why?” and oer my life confusion reigned.
For if surrender was the key to know the Lord and be made full, then why the struggle to be free? Why was it so impossible?
As blossoms drop her fruit can grow, as dissipates the morning dew, as darkness flees before the day, or breath of spring makes all things new, my wilted root, by unseen Hand, was guided on its thirsty course, wending its way through barren land, to tap at last the Living Source.
One glimpse of Him and all the strain and struggle did at once depart; those things I counted once as gain appeared as rubbish to my heart.
As lovers need no influence all rival loves to set aside, I fell in His preeminence that now my heart was crucified.
Who finds the treasure counts no wealth too dear or difficult to give; who would not trade disease for health or give up death and choose to live?
As children gladly drop the toy theit loving parents to embrace, surrender was my greatest joy while gazing on His lovely face.
No eagle and its lofty flight above the world could be so free; my soul was effortless delight enjoy the Lord with liberty. Now Him I seek, not how to give, deny, or Mammon to for sake.
For me, to know Him is to live! Surrender follows in the wake.